Month: October 2012

  • hello.. new phone

    Why do you care if I have a new phone? Well you should because it means I can be on xanga here and there and maybe post and maybe read posts now. :) Well you can thank my amazing boyfriend @cucumber_melonhead who has made this possible. I had been struggling with my last phone for quite some time. He is so selfless. If you haven’t met him go on over to his page and say hello. He’s always so sweet, thoughtful, loving, easy to talk to.

    On Saturday we tried staying up to watch the supposed meteor shower. I took a small blanket out and he his jacket. We had taken showers and put my son to sleep because it was passed midnight. We went outside and I was so cold, he gave me his jacket while I insisted he kept it because I don’t want him sick. His insisting won lol and he still held me to stop the shivering. We were seeing nothing in the sky :( so we went inside his car to wait… we saw some shooting stars (yes, I know what you’re thinking but I’ve also seen a meteor shower and those were not it) In the wait we had a nice deep conversation. I love talking to him. I’ve never been able to trust anyone like I’ve been able to trust him and I do with my life. He knows everything about me and he doesn’t judge me for anything. He is the closest friend bff lol boyfriend forever… haha is that what it means? Jk but he is my best friend and I love him for being who he is and that we have the most amazing trust. I love this man with all my heart! <3 I think he's my soul mate.. or psychic lol Nothing in life could be as perfect as it is now and in our relationship. My son calls his parents... more often a "dad" escapes... they love each other! It's endearing!

    Ok I’m done for now. Thank him for giving me access to internet! Hahaha

  • I’ve been wanting to come and write and I even had topics… but goodness my memory lacks the stimulation and I have completely forgotten, granted it was a few days ago. Oh well..

    Hope all is well in xangaland… Yes sometimes I need to vent and sometimes I’m still going crazy and now the one who puts up with me is so sweet and gentle. He even holds me when I have nightmares at night and wipes my tears. I could never have asked for such a sweet person in the world. 

    It’s so weird though. I don’t understand how I’m’ having all these nightmares suddenly in the last few months. I don’t ever remember having such impacting nightmares where I wake-up scares, crying, hyperventilating… And sadly they’re still engraved in my mind. It’s actually have made me more paranoid about my son, my bf and families well-being.

     

    I just pray that they were just nightmares.

     

    I wasn’t even on planning on going online but my mom needed an order placed so she send me to starbucks. It’s nice and relaxing me time. I needed this. I went to buy a scratcher because I even had a dream about that and luckily I won $20 =D Sometimes nights just get better than days… *sigh* … I was just a little stressed today with a bill I have to pay. it happens that something went wrong and they had made a mistake so i had to fix it and it was 93.14 and a little unexpected but at least it’s up to date and the landlord can stop his whining. I wish my parents can get out of here but when we start seeing the light at the end of the tunnel it ends up just being the reflection of incoming traffic. *sigh* one day… and then I try and finally treat myself for something and sometimes I end up feeling bad… God, I’m praying for a job. I guess we all wish they’d land in our laps but that never hardly ever happens.  

    oh well, hope you all have a wonderful day or night where ever you are. I’m sorry I haven’t stopped by. I need internet to take the time to read and when I come to use the internet I’m usually in a hurry. 

     

    Good night all…