June 17, 2011
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Undate-able
So I've come to this conclusion all my my lonesome... UNDATEABLE!
or
Can it be that I don't meet the right people in real...
The only people I ever would have really wanted to meet were nerds in my classes... You know the "know it alls" but they lacked personality and had the need to do everything but enjoy some company. Not only that I guess I must have missed a lot of opportunities I was in a serious relationship for a while of my college career adventure and graduated with a baby... After that who would want a girl like me?
Hey guys, I do have a mind of my own... I know sad... yea, you can't tell me what you want and not expect me to ask for something in return... fyi I'm not going to ask for a "ring", "a car" "a house" or "kids" those are all decisions... (will you ever get near to any of them, not sure) But I will say, with a job I know I can have each of those my self oh and for kids... I have one... (kids= the most serious talk in the world with me... SERIOUS)
I don't have that of a distasteful personality... it can be a lil different but who's isn't?
I to enjoy talking and flirting sometimes but don't get me wrong I don't cheat or ever will. Don't expect anything from it.
The definition of "love" by gentlemen's actions has made my thoughts of love "fickle"
I don't dance... well I haven't done so since freshmen year or maybe beginning of sophomore year in college...max when I was 19... that's like 7 years...
I do have an ocassional drink ... My thought process while inibriated still the same but a lil more brave but not very brave... I still wont sing in front of people lilke kareoke even though I've wanted to try...
I'm attached to my phone... but if I can manage to ignore my phone for hours so can you ...
Part of what i enjoy is talking... doesn't even cost anything... I like to save people money...
(religion has been taken out-for the time being it use to hold an importance- currently not sure about organize religion-) at the time getting to know the person for who they and stand for are more important than their beliefs... Religion right now seems relative...
I love staring at the stars... one day i'm going to by a telescope...
I enjoy classical music... but I don't make you listen to it but I also enjoy Symphony Orchestras, Operas, Ballet -- Hello music major.... and I enjoy the Arts...
I enjoy rock (My fav station KROQ) but if you're not in LA you don't hear it but even I don't get to since I live a lil far from it. I literally like all types of music, rock, punk, emo, all the variations of all of those combined and I'm open to new bands, I like rap, hip hop, R&B, some mainstream... But I hardly listen to radio and I certainly don't want TV (seriously), there are even a few countries songs I like. I'm pretty well rounded...
I would love to visit museums.. last time I was in one I was probably 7 yrs old
Kids --- I'm a single mother of one... so if you can't accept that oh well... as for kids with someone else... I'm almost certain I don't want any. (well unless you have a good reason- it's an discuss-able topic. You just might be an exception as mentioned above this is a SERIOUS topic)
Cuddling- never had it so I'm not sure if I like it or not but it would be interesting.
I've always slept pretty much alone or slept in a really small bed with my son so I tend to stay in an edge of the bed no matter what usually...
i do like make-up... I've minimized in the years...
Oh and I hate cleaning but I hate a dirty place... realize that if I clean it gets dirtier first then somewhat clean... to almost spotless...
Dishes sometimes give me comfort... when I do chores I listen to music and tune everything out
I dislike talking on the phone but when I'm talking to someone I enjoy it... (nobody ever calls me...
)I like doing laundry... nothing like having clean clothes... hate putting them away though...
I enjoy cooking but don't make me angry because then I wont want to make anything
I am not hot temptered at all but do tend to have dominant type of character which sometimes makes me clash with people... I'm actually quite patient but tick me off and the gloves are off. (maybe the full Mexican in me) But, if you can handle me, I'm the most passive as girls come as well... you can't handle a girl with a stronger character.
You are either submissive (which I use to be, timid, controllable but not completely anymore) or have the power to control a household which I know I can... I tend not to take leadership positions but when I have them... I make best of the power I know how to use it well to the benefit of everybody.
I on a rare ocassion can be very opinionated and that's more and more when you know what I stand for.
I don't expect special treatment as long as you treat me with respect.
I do enjoy chivalry but not having it isn't a deal breaker... I can make it on my own... having a hard time starting now... but once i'm there ... I know how to handle.
i was over protected as a child and sometimes my thoughts and the way I make up my mind can't be innocent (child like, naive, ignorant)
I've been single most of my life with exception of 3 years... so I'm not susceptible (can be a lil gullible but you can figure that out)
I compromise my experiences... I accept people for who they are completely (good and bad and if I don't I wont consider you from the get go) but my free acceptance leaves me hanging... I feel as though they never accepted me back the same way... (I guess acceptance isn't reciprocated)
As time passes my wall of attachment has grown higher and thicker. Don't think I don't let people talk to me because I do. Some who I let them talk to me have an advantage already but most don't know how to use it. I end up just stacking them up as just friends... And I can tell the difference in flirting too...
I rather be alone than unhappy.
My heart basically tolerate a "3 strikes your out system" - well I haven't counted how many strikes each person gets but knowingly or unknowingly people are given chances... and this only applies to talking and maybe dating... relationship is different. If you can't make it while we talkor date why would I want a relationship with you.
I'm still friends with people I've talked to or dated... they give me advice on guys... heads up... Who knows men better than them they know different types of men and how the are
I wont lie to you but you better not lie to me... When I find out....guess what? a thicker wall means harder work... and not worth it for you. (just being honest)
at some point in the talking... I so some pursuing... just like it was done to me... but if you get comfortable with that... DONT... If I see no reciprocation (or intent from your side) I move on... simple... have had a few guys get too comfortable... doesn't work, sorry!
I analyze a lot ... and think a lot... so I listen to music to clear up my mind
Yea, so I'm undate-able....
Have you ever felt like you were undateable or just not compatible with anybody?
Comments (23)
Ha! You sound dateable =P
But yeah, I'm personally not compatable. Personality has a lot to do with it, and the girls/young women that shown interest (and vice versa) just don't mesh very well.
@IllTroubadour - haha... totally dateable... or a nightmare... haha!
Personality has a lot to do it with it for me too. I tend to be compatible with older guys... that's why I don't do dating sites because i'm not attracted to older guys. I do great with people but they don't do great with me. lol ... maybe i'm not the one off after all... lol
I am going to post on a related topic, in a bit. To answer your exact question- Plenty of times, I've found I was incompatible with one woman or another. Live and let live.
I never really considered myself undateable, as a younger man. This made it relatively easy when the woman I would marry decided I was the one for her. We had a great time together, even when she first started to decline from her disease.
Your guy will probably turn up in a very unlikely situation, but you'll know, for sure.
I got nothing
@RighteousBruin - yes, I can't wait to read it. Truth be told I don't be I'm undateable it just the way life seems. Through out my years I've seen girls date and get married and be somewhat happy. Not to be conceited because most of the time I don't see myself as pretty or anything there are girls who I thought I looked prettier than and of course different personality and they've found someone so it makes me think there is something wrong with me. lol I know stupid... but I have to do something wrong. I actually think I'm a very good match for people but I guess I feel like I'm a last resort or that's what I feel. See I wont accept a person unless I'm willing to accept then as a whole knowing their good and and bad side, and I guess where I go wrong is where they can't accept that from me... lol (yea, I go wrong... I'm actually fairly nice and sweet, thoughtful- which actually is the problem) I'm sure someone will pop up but then I wonder if they'll wonder if something's wrong with me because I'm available... haha When I talk to people they like the way I am, my personality, looks but then I don't know what goes wrong. I'm always left stupefied.
@TexasTidbits - thanks for neither accepting or rejecting the claim... haha!
@pinktiger335 - Beautiful people can be "available" at any age. My wife was 26 when I first met her, and she had a terrible self-concept, on the surface. Deep down inside, she knew everything I said that was good about her was true.
A lot of her "imperfect behaviors' were just defense mechanisms. They melted away as we got stronger as a couple.
You just didn't meet the right man. Your list is pretty good. I don't know how old you are but as you get older the list gets longer lol
@RighteousBruin - You're right that beautiful people can be found everywhere. I'm like I was told when i was younger that looks don't quite matter (well to an extent) I think that a person has more important features to offer than looks. I can understand your wife's concept. I'm 26 right now. It's hard to trust sometimes... needs some time to get use to. I matured at a very young age. By the age of 10 I had a naive outlook of life, I was responsible for my siblings and kids my mom baby sat. I've heard about my defense mechanism from a gentleman I date a few time a few months back. He said I would get defensive. We had some tough conversations and disagreements but we would talk them through.I always speak of time... with time everything in a couple should get stronger and if it doesn't it might never happen.
@blazeofglory1981 - Story of everybody's life, you know? lol The biggest headline "Guy doesn't meet perfect Girl" or visa versa... I am currently 26.
And I believe my list can get longer... I'm sure I can make it longer now too... but it's not worth mentioning everything... I just added some things that would seem more negative than any positive.
im pretty sure your date-able. cus a lot of what you described up there is a lot of what I am .... ofcourse with the exception of one or two things.
nothing else i could add...
Mr.Ready to Commit will come along sooner or later.
Hope its sooner! =] <3
BTW
The kids have been asking about Danny! They miss him! =]
"I love staring at the stars... one day i'm going to by a telescope..."
"Oh and I hate cleaning but I hate a dirty place... realize that if I
clean it gets dirtier first then somewhat clean... to almost
spotless... "
"Dishes sometimes give me comfort... when I do chores I listen to music and tune everything out "
"I like doing laundry... nothing like having clean clothes... hate putting them away though... "
"I enjoy cooking but don't make me angry because then I wont want to make anything "
EXTREMELY SUPER MEGA ABSOLUTOOTALUUUUTLY AGREE! =D
@Snoog420 - Haha, thanks,,, Maybe but you're married ... lol... Mr. Ready to Commit isn't the problem... can we stand each other after more than a few months... lol. I guess I wonder if I can handle someone sticking it through. I worry, if I can't adapt to being in a relationship type situation.C'est la vie! And I'm glad you agree with those you quoted
And just a few days ago danny gets his back back ready and tells me "I'm going to Ray's house..." I felt so bad having to say no.... but heads up I might have to go to DC with my mom and might need danny to stay there from like Wednesday/thursay to Sunday, I can't remember time date yet. And my sis had booked a flight to Minnesota and apparently she can't go so she was wondering if I would use it and pay her once I could which will probably take some time but if I do go it's in exactly 3 weeks, and I almost can't miss this opportunity ... July7th-13th... so heads up =D please...
hahaha yea I get you. Maybe you have just gotten so use to being single. But I am sure you can stick it out.
and Oh ok. for sure ... =] cool ... maybe I'll take all four kids pics while he is here...=]
oh and Art asked if he was going to go to school down the hill or up the hill?
no need to answer now.. just wondering =] that time is nearing. ahhh school! oh and we might put Ray in an extra curricular and was wondering if Danny might want to too. We were thinking Martial Arts or Soccer....Let me know whenever k. =]
@Snoog420 - haha... getting use to being single... I think I live single life... have... it's more like how do you ever not get use to it when that's all you've been. 3 yrs in comparison to 23... 23 is a bigger number... haha... I sure can stick it out
lol... I know being a lil confidant is overbearing. Yea, pics would be awesome!!! As of right now I think I'm going to enroll Danny up here... if we're too move down then we'll find a way to make it work and I'll do the transfer stuff. I know I'm excited and frustrated about the school thing... it freaks me out like you have no idea... mainly for time purposes, lol. But happy he's going to go to school. Danny so needs extracurricular haha... that would be great but we'll talk about it! =D
Have you ever felt like you were undateable or just not compatible with anybody?
YES!!!!!!!
I know how you feel. If anything my career makes me undatable because I'll be on the road half the month, and as such am unable to have much contact with a significant other.
@buddy71 - That makes 2 of us, hun! Can can have happy moments and yet be so cruel at the same time...
@StatelessPilot@revelife - yea, you're right Lynn... .you best find a girl who already flies in the same airline as you or your co-pilot or your captain... lol ... or maybe a stewardess =D Life is too precious to be alone.
That's a good list, but I don't think it makes you undateable I think it means you have higher expectations in yourself and any potential suitor. All the best to you!
@NVPhotography - That list contains mainly the negative though... I do have higher expectations hence why dating can be tougher... I guess it's a good way to know where we stand with issues though. I always feel the person should know the main parts and then learn the rest as I would with them as well. Thanks! =D I don't expect guys to expect less from me either... life is difficult enough to complicate it more.
@pinktiger335 - Good for you
"I don't expect guys to expect less from me either... life is difficult enough to complicate it more" Amen to that!
@pinktiger335 - i dont see you as "undateable nor incompatible" at all. you have listed some great qualities that are very desirable.
@NVPhotography - I guess we all have to have certain persona rules in order for it work out... otherwise... you've got nothing. I think
@buddy71 - thank you darling... those were most of the negative... I didn't post positive... lol (I think) yea, most were negative... I didn't add the positive ones that I do have... *shrug* in this post I was being a lil biased...
hmmm
You're not undateable at all.
Now I, on the other hand...
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